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Steve Basilone's "Long Weekend" opens with a message playing, from some sort of doctor or specialist, pleading with the person they're calling to return their call as soon as possible. We see Bart (Finn Wittrock) laying on a couch, playing those messages, but it's unclear what's going on with him. Is he sick? It's a fair assumption, if you, at first blush, know what kind of movie you're getting into with "Long Weekend."

The movie, admittedly, isn't one of those terminally ill weepers, though it plays with the tropes associated with whirlwind romance movies. Bart is having a hard time right now, and those professional but concerned messages become clearer as the movie goes on. He can no longer afford his apartment, so he is being forced to move into his friends' garage (played by Damon Wayans Jr. and Casey Wilson, in a nice wink towards "Happy Endings, which Basilone has directed). Without any place to really go, Bart grabs a bottle of booze and heads to the movies one afternoon. He drinks a little too much during the movie, passes out, and is startled awake by Vienna (Zoe Chao). They talk for a little bit after the movie and end up getting drinks together and hitting it off.

Bart and Vienna form a fast relationship, as characters are wont to do in movies like "Long Weekend." Wittrock and Chao have nice chemistry and some playful banter, but "Long Weekend" strains a bit too hard to try and distinguish itself from movies of similar ilk. The discoveries and twists in Bart and Vienna's relationship never really add up to anything coherent, instead feeling like pieces of a puzzle forced together. Some plot points probably sounded better on paper than they translate to the screen.

In Bart and Vienna's first outing the day they meet, Bart references the tried-and-true trope of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Bart is immediately attracted to Vienna, but her bubbly presence and their immediate courtship seem too good to be true for him. It's a self-knowing reference for Basilone to make, and it feels as though it's included to accept possible criticism of his movie being exactly what he is referencing. That's exactly what is happening. "Long Weekend" isn't a satire, it's another tale of a boy meeting girl at the time he needed to most.

The whole movie is glittery and dreamily shot, captured by Felipe Vara de Rey but it all just feels like a similar tune, trying to be sung in a different key. "Long Weekend" is inoffensive, but ultimately forgettable.