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Creatures of Hobbit

"So began a battle that none had expected; and it was called the Battle of Five Armies, and it was very terrible." - The Hobbit, J.R.R. Tolkien

Well, in this case, it's possible that everyone expected "The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies". And it is not very terrible. But it's also not particularly good. Having spent the past two films and 330 minutes on a mere thirteen chapters of J.R.R. Tolkien's 1937 bedtime story, director Peter Jackson has given himself the dubious task of dragging out another film based on its final six chapters. As a result, this "Hobbit" is heavy on battle, light on reason for existing.

"The Battle of the Five Armies" picks up where "The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug" left off, ironically telling the finale of that story (the actual desolation of Smaug) in its opening act. From there, as the charred and besieged residents of Lake-town tend to their wounded, the Lonely Mountain becomes much less lonely. With Bilbo, Thorin Oakenshield and his company of Dwarves holed up in their newly-won mountain fortress, the titular forces descend upon them for various reasons.

(It's actually a bit distracting trying to count the specific five armies. There are Dwarves, Elves, Men and Orcs - then some Goblins and Eagles come by, as well as other legions of Dwarves and Orcs. And don't get me started on the giant bats and Dune-esque "earth-eaters". I imagine the number five is more of a guideline than a rule.)

But regardless of how you're counting, the largely CGI-generated combatants all want one thing: to get into that mountain. It contains what can only be described as Scrooge McDuckian amounts of gold. And who wouldn't want that? Unfortunately, it also contains an unhealthy dose of "dragon sickness" - a kind of wild paranoia that begins to affect those who covet the treasure, including the otherwise noble Thorin (Richard Armitage).

Mr. Jackson is wise enough to keep the battle focused on the smaller moments, rather than over-indexing on showy CGI combat (but don't worry, there's plenty of that). The issue with "Five Armies" may be the fact that there aren't many characters worth that kind of focus. Compared to the cast of "Lord of the Rings", this "Hobbit" seems filled with secondary players: Bard the Bowman, Dwarves Fili and Kili, fabricated she-Elf Tauriel (Evangeline Lilly). Bilbo (Martin Freeman, still great) plays his pivotal part, but he has precious (yes, precious) little screen-time.

The actors do their part to fill out the roles, but these characters have none of the gravity of the favorites from "Lord of the Rings". As a result, "Five Armies" feels like going through the motions, particularly with grossly extended (slo-mo!) fights between Thorin and pale Orc Azog the Defiler as well as Legolas and equally pale Orc, Bolg. The classic Jackson addition of comic relief, Alfrid (Ryan Gage), is far more annoying than funny, and the gonzo wizard battle at Dol Guldur (complete with Cate Blanchett's Galadriel going all J-Horror again) is liable to anger some purists.

Mr. Jackson very cleverly sets up "The Lord of the Rings" films, which technically take place 60 years after the events of this film and serve mostly to remind viewers of that far superior trilogy. "Return of the King" was the best of that trilogy. "Five Armies" may be this series' weakest. At a lean two hours and fifteen minutes, we should be thankful that Mr. Jackson restrained himself, but unlike the actor playing Bombur, the padding here shows.

It's worth noting that this film, like the others, is shot in High Frame Rate 3D (HFR 3D), causing that odd hyper-real feeling that almost looks like videotape. It, like the 3D, takes some getting used to and does the film no favors.